Letters (Sent to the OTS Penthouse Suite)
With success comes a price. For all the "awards" we've won with On the Street, it makes sense that sooner or later it would get back to Africa. And the Isle of Wales.
Here is the first letter that came in this week...
Exhibit A - The Case of the Late Great Cocoa Merchant
From: Nina Douala
Abidjan, Cote D'Ivoire.
Good day I am Nina Douala. From Abidjan Cote d'ivoire, I wish to request for your urgent assistance in my investment plans in your base, I am calling in respect of the transfer of money ($6.500,000) Six Million Five houndred thousand united states dollars only deposit in the bank by my late Father Mr Joseph Douala who was a wealthy Cocoa Merchant here in Ivory Coast. I wish to invest this money in manufacturing and real estate management in your base,this is because I inheritated an important sum from my late father who died in recent political crisis in Cote d'Ivoire here.
Before the death of my father he informed me near his hospital bed at chu- teaching hospital, that he has saved the in one of the bank here in cote d Ivoire with my name, and I have made every inquired to confirm the existence of the deposit.
This money was been deposited for my social security and for fruitful international investment.That is why I need you to keep this transaction highly confidential and trustworthy person who will assist me to receive this money overseas for investment establishment purposeindurities and lucratives profitable ventures.
Further directives and details about the deposit and on how to move the money successfully into your private bank account in your country will be given to you as soon as I get your response, Thanks and anticipating to hear from you immediately you recieve this mail. God bless.
I realize Nina wanted to keep this matter between us but I felt it was too important to keep a secret.
And if that letter wasn't enough, I then received this following letter a record 17 times in 30 minutes, setting off a new wave of Welsh spammers philanthropists...
Exhibit B - Pioneer Days
Andrew David Office
David Consultant Intl
12, Vic, Ave,
Tel: +61 (02) 800 #$%%##
Final Notification of Bequest,
Congratulation On behalf of the Trustees and Executor of the estate of Late Engr. James Jones, I once again try to notify you as my earlier letter to you through the Post Office was returned undelivered, therefore I now attempt to reach you via your email address as it appears to be the next and the only option left explored.
Engr. James Jones (late), made you a beneficiary in his Will, he left properties worth of Two Million United States Dollars (US$2.000.000.00) to you in the codicil and last testament to his Will. My client, Engr. James Jones, was a pioneer and member of STARBAG CONSTRUCTION CO.LTD, a dedicated Christian and Philanthropist. He died on 2004 and his Will is now ready for execution.
Please If I reach you as hopeful I will, endeavor to get back to me as soon as possible to enable me conclude my job, you should forward along your current telephone and Fax numbers, your current mailing address.
Once again, I congratulate you for this is a significant honor indeed, as it behooves you herefore to act at once in other to avoid risk of forfeiture to the deceased family.
Andrew David (Sectional Head)
Co - Partner of the New South Wales
These first two letters are obviously serious business of commerce and finance. Luckily, longtime reader Michael sent this mp3 document to lighten the mood. It dovetails nicely with his previous contribution of last week.
To fully enjoy this following clip one need not know the previous work of the Jerky Boys, nor have read Norman Mailer's forgotten essay from 1957 called "The White Negro". However, there's no reason one shouldn't.
As with the last clip from longtime reader Michael, this is NSFW, again, unless of course you work out at sea, as baseball coach, or most appropriately, a used car salesman...
Exhibit C : PT Cruising
The Problem with Knight Rider
It seems a new Knight Rider television show is about to premier. Of course this is great. Observe the new trailer...
However, there seems to be something missing. It's as if Knight Rider 2000 the television movie is completely being avoided in the discussion. Observe the trailer for this forgotten (but culturally significant) tv movie.
I realize this a bit of a step, but walk with me. Watch the first and last seconds of that trailer again. If you do, then you'll realize that this movie was shot in San Antonio.
The smoking gun?
The last shot of the trailer shows a car chase/explosion happen right in front of Tacoland. Let me restate that: the Hoff filmed a Knight Rider car chase in front of Tacoland! This is too good to be true.
Hoff can enjoy his recent foray into nostalgia with the Knight Rider franchise but it should be remembered that it was the city of San Antonio that opened up its doors to him when Knight Rider was not cool, Baywatch had yet to be born, and he was basically a joke (which of course, is much different than now. Completely different.)
In all this discussion, the ridiculous assumptions of the Knight Rider 2000 shouldn't be overlooked. It's the same argument from the 1970s that only criminals carry guns, cops can only carry toy water pistols, society has completely fallen apart, and if only a hero could restore order and save us from this chaos...
And Then There's This Chaos
Deep chaos. Now almost forgotten, Godspeed You Black Emperor made music feel like cinema, and with this video I stumbled upon, one of their most famous "songs" is now complemented with visuals. I feel wrong in calling it a Ken Burns film of an apocalypse yet to be documented but that's what it feels like. Except that its much more artistic and nuanced. And at the end, does it almost seem like that it's an alternate version of KITT driving through he wasteland?
But There's Hope?
On Saturday, instead of lunch at Garcia's I was told of some sort of Obama rally happening downtown. I had heard but forgotten that the campaign office is next to the Lake/Flato office around 3rd street somewhere.
I'm too cynical to get overly excited about Obama. I had thought he might be too thin - not because of the smoking issue and appetite suppressants but on issues in general.
After 8 years in Siberia who wouldn't get excited for something new? However, I'm glad that Hillary is giving him a strong fight. I say that because I completely disagree with the widely held notion that the two Democratic candidates need to work together and find a consensus as soon as possible. The process needs to play itself out until the convention if needed. If that isn't what the convention is for then what's the point of these institutions of democracy.
(the interior was packed and humid. my glasses fogged over. i hung outside instead.)
Also, in 2004 Kerry got a free pass by the left on everything and was pushed into the forefront way too quickly. He was able to give lip service to the left on many issues and didn't fully serve his base. I think the two candidates now need to put themselves on record as much as possible on what they intend to do, which for politicians probably just means more slogans and less reality, but to me the real hope for change is that something meaningful will come out of this.
The recent trade by the Spurs sending out Elson and more importantly Brent Barry has had a deep impact for On the Street. Though the team improved its defense and rebounding, my main issue is where are we going to find a someone of his wit to match his surfing skills as well as inside connections to the band Pearl Jam? This is actually a serious question.
Barry may have been injured for good, but if so I think we would have heard about it, especially because we sent him to Spurs v2.0 in Seattle with Sam Presti and PJ Carlesimo (the other PJ in Seattle) where he isn't expected to have much of an impact with a young, struggling team that is only looking towards next year when his contract expires.
I suppose if I had a press pass with the Spurs I would be able to get to the bottom of this...alas for now I can only call upon years of armchair psychology and an innate sense of things (whatever the German word for that is.)
To conclude, more on the Barry trade next week when there is more perspective.
And so goes another week on the streets of San Antonio. As always, to be continued...